My Twitter Got Hacked

They got me, girls

Before we get into it, I kindly ask that you not tag my Twitter account (@jpbrammer) with this post, or with any information presented in it, as doing so could put me in danger. I’ll explain below. Thank you so much!

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It’s all happening on X, folks. And unfortunately, it’s happening to me, specifically. 

It was only a matter of time before I memed too close to the sun. Last Thursday, I opened Twitter, as I’ve done since 2014, and quote-tweeted an article about New York City’s rat-proof bins not being rat-proof after all. I did so with a painting of Paul Revere and the caption “THE BINS AREN’T RAT PROOF!” I’m silly. But it crossed my mind, after posting the image, that the artist’s name was on it, and I wondered if maybe this constituted some sort of theft on my part.

Sure enough, I soon received an email from X about someone flagging a copyright complaint against my page. “Ah!” I thought. “My comeuppance was swift!” So, I opened the email, which led me to an X login and, foolishly, I typed in my information. That’s on me! I goofed. I have a VPN, anti-virus, several filters in place in my inbox, 2FA activated on my account, and so on, so I suppose I assumed I was safe. But, ultimately, I made a mistake. I’ve been dealing with some mental health issues lately, as my friends would tell you, and I haven’t been thinking clearly. Even on my best days, though, sometimes I just do profoundly illogical things. It’s how my brain works! I’ve been dealing with it for most of my life. Yes, it’s exhausting. 

But anyway, I got hacked. I wasn’t really panicking. Strangely enough, this has happened to me before, back in August, when I got an email informing me that someone had logged into my account from Russia, and then another email from Google (a more functioning company) that said it blocked someone from trying to log into my Gmail. I have no earthly idea how this person got my information, or how they got past my 2FA on X, but they did. 

They locked my account, made themselves a delegate (this allows them to post on my behalf), and started trying to sell, of all things, MacBooks at incredibly low prices. Proceeds, the hacker said, would go to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. Those who know me well know I would never do anything charitable, so I wasn’t afraid of anyone getting fooled. I changed my password, but my 2FA code wasn’t working, so I went through X support, and they turned 2FA off, and I simply logged back in, and everything was fine. 

I guess I figured this time would be like last time. But it was not! This hacker was much more serious. I received a message on WhatsApp from this person, whose name was “King,” and whose profile picture is a man in a tuxedo sitting in a shadowy room with his face concealed. We’re dealing with a very serious, very edgy person here. 

So, King informed me that he had control of my account and, not only that, but he was going through my private information. He then threatened to out me as gay if I didn’t pay him $2,000. 

First of all, trying to extort me for being gay is like trying to extort the pope for being Catholic. Second of all, $2,000 seems like a paltry sum for a classic Twitter account that’s given the world such treasures as “how did they crucify a pea?” 

Regardless, the dark part of all this, the truly upsetting part, is that he found explicit images in my messages (I am a homosexual in New York City, don’t play dumb) and is threatening me with those as well. The situation I’m in at the moment is one of active extortion. Not super great. I strongly preferred my life before I was being extorted.

This all went down on Thursday and, since then, I’ve been trying to get ahold of someone, anyone at X to help me, but to no avail. I was able to change my password, but because I have 2FA on, I can’t actually get in. I’ve used the code in my Passwords app on my phone that’s supposed to be connected to X’s 2FA system, but it’s not accepting any of the codes. Every time I file a complaint, I get an automated response that says that I still have control of my account. Every time I try to turn off my 2FA, I get an email saying “try to log in, then respond to this email, and we’ll continue to help you,” but nothing ever happens. I haven’t received anything besides automated responses for days, and I have no idea what other channels are available to me. Meanwhile, the hacker is threatening me, though I haven’t responded. You can see how stressful this all might be on someone. 

Now, look. I get that Twitter isn’t what it once was. This has been a hard fact for me to accept, as someone who used the platform to build my career. I was a recent college grad in Oklahoma, eager to prove myself as a writer, but didn’t know anyone in the industry. Twitter was one of the few open doors for me and, over time, I found an audience of over 160k people, one I worked hard to cultivate. I’ve met dear friends there, have found opportunities there, and, yes, have been frustrated and stressed out by it as well.

I’ve known for some months now that X isn’t where I should be. But I’m stubborn, and I suppose I felt like I could push through it. This saga is a rude reminder that things have changed, and I’d be better off investing my digital presence elsewhere. Like here, for example, where I have a wonderful audience of dedicated readers who I love making things for. But I want to arrive at conclusions like that on my own terms, and not because some guy calling himself “King” on WhatsApp is threatening to show my shaft to my media colleagues. You understand? 

I wanted to write all this out for a number of reasons. For one, I’ve received many, many texts and emails asking if I’d been hacked, or if I knew that I’d been hacked, and so today I’d like to announce that, yes, I am aware. I am a monkey that has been trained to push the serotonin-delivering “post Tweet” button for over a decade. It was incredibly apparent to me that I had been hacked within minutes of the hacking taking place, but I nonetheless appreciate the sentiment of reaching out.

Second, you all know I love to laugh, but some people have been trying to make light of this situation with me, I think because they weren’t aware of the whole extortion component, and I want to say, earnestly and clearly: I feel violated and unsafe, and I’m not in the mood to joke about it. My hope is that one day we can revisit this saga and share a giggle, on a day when I am not being threatened. 

Lastly, I want to apologize. My lapse in judgment could very much lead to someone being scammed, or someone’s private messages with me being seen, and I feel awful about that. It really hurts me, and I’m sorry. My hope is that, even if X never returns my account to me, they at least terminate it or something so it can’t do further harm. I’ve lost sleep over this, have been finding it hard to focus on other things, and I can’t imagine not saying anything about it. So, this is me saying something about it. 

For now, Substack is a great place to keep in touch with me. This is where I share my work, and my goal moving forward is to build even more of a network here. The best way to support me is to subscribe, or become a paid subscriber. I’m really excited to share some of the things I’ve been cooking up lately, and I hope I’m able to put my attention on those things, the good things, in the near future, and put this disturbing situation behind me.

That’s all from me. Happy Halloween, and stay safe out there.

John Paul