14 Comments
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Jendi's avatar

Sylvia Plath Smurf

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Hunter Harris's avatar

we've got another hit on our hands

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John Paul Brammer's avatar

😭😭❤️

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Gnome de Plume's avatar

A banger, as the kids say

Which kids? I dunno.

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Caroline's avatar

I want to share the section about depression with so many people, but I dunno how I’m gonna do it by starting with “so this is actually about the Smurfs movie, but hear me out…”

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Lou's avatar

I’m so mad at how good of an essay this is

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Adam's avatar

I took my daughter to this yesterday, she spent most of her time asking about the animals rather than laughing, but I was more frustrated than disappointed with the movie: there's a handful of moments, the evil wizard meeting being on mute, introducing the ridiculous nature of the Things for Smurfs such as "All The Way Over There Smurf" or whatever he was called, or the animation shifts in the dimensions. The writer had SpongeBob pedigree and a few times I felt that spark, then it was smothered by lazy, boring plot writing coupled with comatose voices and scene shifts that exist only for the trailer (Here's Australia! Here's Paris! Here's a Mario-esque rainbow road sequence with the characters going WHOOAAAA and so on).

I wonder how much studio interference forced the surreal gags that were actually worthy of the Rescue Rangers movie from a couple of years ago to be squashed in favour of lengthy mentions of zoom and podcasts and LinkedIn and the same full length hip hop tinged pop dance numbers that have been present in kid's movies since Happy Feet?

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Elaine Marilyse's avatar

1. 10/10, this is the cultural criticism we need, I laughed far too hard at "also a kind of blue."

2. Hope you get out of the smurf village of the mind as soon as possible.

3. Did you know in Belgium they're called the Schtroumpfs?

4. something something Cat Gargamarnell

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K M's avatar

What about Influencer Smurf? I recall seeing it in the trailers and had a violent reaction

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Elisabeth Donnelly's avatar

Kid screenings involve a LOT of talking to and back at the screen! I forced my husband to take my daughter to this - the endless ads featuring a "girl smurf" is why she wanted to see it. She has not talked about it since.

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Lucy's avatar

Fun fact: Superman is referred to multiple times in the new movie as Big Blue! And I *am* (big blue)

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Jack Ninivaggi's avatar

Enough Smurfs, bring back the Snorks.

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Isa's avatar

I can’t even - brilliant piece

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Cyrus Draegur's avatar

you chose THIS over Superman?

yeah. okay. all the suffering you experienced from that choice was deserved.

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